Planning The Bachelorette Party
Now it’s time for the real fun to begin…the bachelorette party! This is the bride’s chance to really go wild and dance all her wedding stress away before the big day. Get free shipping on a $50 order from Bachelorette.com
What’s The Difference Between The Bridal Shower And The Bachelorette Party?
Most brides have a bridal shower AND a bachelorette party on two separate occasions and if you do it like most people, they are VERY different. The shower, although you can make it as fun as you want, often has grandmothers and mothers in attendance, and as a result doesn’t get too wild or loud. It’s typically held at one location, such as someone’s house or a favorite restaurant, and lasts a few hours. Conversely, most bachelorette parties are basically just a crazy, crass night out on the town where the bride is paraded around in ridiculous, embarrassing wedding regalia. Of course, if you’ve learned anything from this site, it is what? Every bride is different. While some will lap up the attention they’ll get from people because they’re wearing a blinking tiara and a Bachelorette sash, others would be extremely uncomfortable and would prefer something more low-key.
What Types Of Different Bachelorette Parties Are There?
The traditional bachelorette party is as we mentioned earlier: a wild night out just for the girls, where the bride is adorned with tiaras, or homemade t-shirts, or any number of phallic-shaped items. A popular activity is to give all the girls in the party a scavenger hunt and put them on teams and the first one to complete all their tasks wins something. It’s a great way to get everyone out and about and talking to people and having fun. Since most bachelorette parties like this involve drinking, it’s a good idea to book several hotel rooms near where you’ll be going out so you don’t have guests driving home. Plus, it can serve as a central meeting location for everyone to get the party started.
However, if your bride is not up for this kind of party, there are plenty of other options. Some brides’ perfect bachelorette party might be simply going out to dinner and drinks with the girls, or to a wine bar, or to a spa for the day. One very fun (and funny) idea is the Ugly Bridesmaid Dress party. Invite all the guests to arrive wearing an old bridesmaid dress to get one more use out of them. Or you could buy a selection of awful formal dresses from a thrift shop or Goodwill to have available for guests and wait for the hilarity to ensue. This party idea makes for priceless pictures and is sure to lead to lots and lots of laughing, a great stress reducer for the tense bride.
Who Is Invited To The Bachelorette Party?
Bachelorette party invitees are typically close friends of the bride who are also invited to the wedding. Depending on how wild you plan to get, you probably don’t want to invite family (other than sisters or close cousins) or elders. But there’s no limit to how many people you can invite-the more, the merrier!
When Should We Host A bachelorette Party?
Get with the bridesmaids and come up with a few tentative dates, then check with the bride. As I mentioned earlier, it’s helpful to do this several weeks or a month before the wedding so she has the time before the wedding to finish up last minute things. Surely this goes without saying, but I’m going to say it anyway: do NOT have the bachelorette party the night before. Even the weekend before is cutting it close to the wedding, because the bride probably intends to spend that last week perfecting her body, skin, hair, etc. A really crazy bachelorette party could lead to a good two-day hangover, which is not a good start to a week of beautifying, is it?
Who Pays For The Bachelorette Party?
Unlike the shower, where it’s never ok to ask guests to pay for anything, the nature of the bachelorette party makes it much more acceptable. It often involves a hotel room and transportation, which you can ask everyone who is using them to help pay for. A typical hotel room that sleeps 4-6 should cost between $120-240, and this truly varies by city and area. Costs for a limo or party bus also vary by area, anywhere from $80 to $300 an hour. And you may go out to a bar which would involve cover charges and the cost of drinks, and guests will expect to pay their own way here (but try to make sure the bride never has to get out her wallet!) Just be considerate-you might be able to afford to stay in an expensive hotel room or book a limo or a party bus, but not everyone can. Just keep in mind that some people may not come if you make the cost of attending too high. The one thing you and the bridesmaid really should pay for is if you plan to provide food and drinks in the hotel room or the central meeting location.
What Do We Do About Invitations?
A bachelorette party is much less formal than the shower usually, so online invitations, such as those from evite.com, are very popular for this type of party. We still can’t condone the use of the store-bought invitations that you write on yourself, but if you must, use them for the bachelorette party instead of the shower. However, there is often a lot of information to convey about a bachelorette party, such as how much they’ll need to pay if you’re getting hotels or transportation, what to expect, etc. It’s difficult to fit all that on one of those tiny hand-written invitations. Like with the shower, you can buy the package of already designed invitations and just lay out the wording with your computer, and they should be sent 3-4 weeks before the party.
Should We Ask Guests To Bring Gifts?
Since you’ve already hosted a shower that required guests to bring gifts, it’s a good idea not to ask them to bring gifts to the bachelorette party. If all the bachelorette party guests weren’t invited to your shower, one idea is to call it a Lingerie Shower/Bachelorette Party, or ask the guests to bring lingerie or naughty gifts from a sex shop-the more embarrassing, the better! Often, people will just bring gifts like this on their own, so it’s perfectly ok not to instruct them to do so, especially if you’re already asking them to pay their own way.
How Much Should The Bridesmaids Help? Should The Bride Get Any Say?
You and the bridesmaids should plan the bachelorette party together, preferably with a little bit of input from the bride just to set ground rules. If you want your plans to be a surprise, that’s ok; just ask her to tell you what she’s not comfortable with ahead of time so you don’t have any hurt feelings the night of the party. Bridesmaids should help you plan, set up, clean up, and pay for things that you wouldn’t ask your guests to pay for, such as food or drinks for the central meeting location.

More Tips for the Maid of Honor
- You can always print off Bachelorette Party games right from your computer!
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{ 15 comments… read them below or add one }
Thanks for all the tips and very useful information. It’s been a few years since I’ve been the MOH and I needed to brush up on every aspect of being involved in a wedding. Great website!
I think that nowadays it is advisable to keep the cost of the bachelorette party as low as possible. You’re already asking the bridal party to buy a dress and shoes and jewelry and most likely get their hair and make up done the day of the wedding so asking them to shell out another $100 is a lot. Plus in some areas (as it is where I live) the bridesmaids pay for all the bridal shower expenses including a gift. There are many bachelorette party ideas that are fun and cheap.
Great site. It’s nice to see all the duties for the MOH in one place. If you’ve never been one before it’s a great resource.
This is very helpful! I am planning my friend’s bachelorette party, and am a lost soul! This blog is awesome! The homemade shirts are a great idea, I know someone that had custom-made ones done and they were super cute! She got hers made at BridalPartyTees.com, but I’m guessing there are several others sites that do this as well. I checked it out, and Bridal Party also has a neat section of ideas that would supplement this article well, I highly recommend checking it out! (http://www.bridalpartytees.com/?page=Bachelorette Party).
This site is wonderful, and a huge help to MOHs! Thanks for the wonderful info!
OMG, what an excellent source of information all in one place. I was honored to be asked by the bride-to-be if I would be the MOH, but at the same time sooo freaked b/c this is very new to me and “had” no idea where to even begin. So of course I was thrilled to find this website and already have a folder full of ideas and tips. Now I am excited to share my findings. And can now look forward to helping and coordinating where I am needed in the planning of her very BIG day . Awesome website!!
I’m glad you found our site very helpful! Let us know if you have any specific questions and if we don’t know the answer then someone will! Being the Maid of Honor is super special and hope that day brings you much fun and excitement!
I was recently asked to be the matron of honor for a friend of mine. I’ve already planned my own wedding and been a bridesmaid several times, but never the matron (maid) of honor and I’m so excited. I found this website through a Google search and am so glad I did because I wasn’t quite sure about etiquette in regards to who pays for what. This site is a great deal of helpful knowledge…thank you!
I agree- I knew what was expected of me as MOH, but I’m not made of money and I wasn’t sure who was expected to pay for what! This website is so helpful, and the concrete tips set my mind at ease.
This will be my first time being a MOH… I’m so glad I found this site cuz I really had no idea what was expected of me… after ready all this I see I’ve got alot of work cut out for me lol
I was curious on your thoughts. I am honored to be chosen to be my friends MOH don’t get me wrong. But… I am a single,jobless mother of two and really struggling. If I am expected to do all these things, how do I afford it? I wanna be her #1 but don’t want to let her down with my lack of funds. please help
This is my first time being a MOH, so I really don’t know all the etiquette about everything. But to me, the main purpose of MOH is to be there to support the bride, help ease stress, and doing what you can to help out. I think that if you’re honest with your friend about what you can or can’t do, I think she will be glad that you’re being there to support her on her big day. If she is ungrateful because you can’t afford to pay for some of these things, then she probably has some problems of her own.
I had been asked to be the MOH in my sisters wedding recently. I am only 22, and I am such a newbie @ wedding planning. This site is wonderful, thank you for all the useful tips!!
I’ve been asked to be a maid of honor for the first time and I’m super-excited that this site exists. I’m sure it will be my staple in the months ahead
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I am the moh for my best friend in October. I live in ca she lives in il so it’s been an interesting ride this far. Just started planning the bachelorette with the other bm. I am also in need of advice. Has anyone had to attend two weddings in one day? My cousin is getting married the same day as the wedding I’m moh in. They literally booked the date hours apart. I need help coordinating. When is an appropriate time to excuse myself from my friends reception to head to my cousins?
Thanks for all the info!! I have a particular situation that I’d like some help with. I’m the MOH, and there are no other BMs. Her sisters and I live in Georgia and we all fly in for the wedding in Colorado the day before, so the Bachelorette party has to be done that night (the bride is OK with this, since she’s doesn’t usually drink much). It will be 10 of us having dinner at a restaurant she picked and then we’re going to a club. I’d love to be able to pay for everyone’s dinner, but it would probably come to at least $300 including drinks, tip, etc. and I’m just not in the financial position to do this, especially after having to pay for my ticket, dress, gifts, etc. After seeing these and other suggestions, I think I’m only responsible for paying my and the bride’s portions. Will the other girls be expecting me to pay for their dinner as well?? In order to make it clear for everyone else, I think I’m going to ask them to bring cash to make it easier to split the bill. However, since there is no time for a Bridal Shower, some of the guests have asked me about bringing gifts to the Bachelorette. Is it still OK for me to only cover the bride’s portion and let the others pay for their own?
Hi everyone. My best friend asked me to be her MOH. I’ve never even been to a wedding. I am so new to this. I am scared because i go to school and i have a part time job im always busy. And i help my family a lot. I never have some me time. And now a days the economy sucks. So i may need some help, tips, ideas from any professionals that been through this before. I have no idea what to do or how to even get started.